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Welcome one and all to the Late Show.

Welcome one and all to the Late Show

I'm your host Steven Colbert. But

I'm your host Steven Colbert But

but tonight we are all Jimmy Kimmel.

but tonight we are all Jimmy Kimmel

I um

I still have a show though, right? Okay,

I still have a show though right Okay

good. Yesterday, after threats from

good Yesterday after threats from

Trump's FCC chair, ABC yanked Kimmel off

Trump's FCC chair ABC yanked Kimmel off

the air indefinitely. That is blatant

the air indefinitely That is blatant

censorship. And it always starts small.

censorship And it always starts small

You know, remember like in week one of

You know remember like in week one of

his presidency, Gulf of America. Call it

his presidency Gulf of America Call it

Gulf of America. Sure seems harmless,

Gulf of America Sure seems harmless

but with an autocrat, you cannot give an

but with an autocrat you cannot give an

inch. And if ABC thinks,

inch And if ABC thinks

if ABC thinks that this is going to

satisfy the regime, they are woefully

satisfy the regime they are woefully

naive. And clearly they've never read

naive And clearly they've never read

the children's book If You Give a Mouse

a Kimmel.

a Kimmel

And and and to Jimmy and to Jimmy, just

And and and to Jimmy and to Jimmy just

let me say I stand with you and your

staff 100%. And also, you couldn't let

staff 100 And also you couldn't let

me enjoy this for like one week.

me enjoy this for like one week

Just just come on

now. Just just like ours, Jimmy's

now Just just like ours Jimmy's

monologue is about what everyone's

talking about every day. And on Monday,

talking about every day And on Monday

everyone was talking about reactions to

the horrifying assassination of Charlie

Kirk. And Jimmy touched on it in a way

Kirk And Jimmy touched on it in a way

that offended FCC chair and individually

wrapped hard-boiled egg that they sell

at the airport, Brendan Carr.

at the airport Brendan Carr

Carr went on a podcast yesterday

afternoon and described Jimmy's comments

as the sickest conduct possible. Wow,

as the sickest conduct possible Wow

those are strong words. I mean, Jimmy

those are strong words I mean Jimmy

must have really been off the rails. I

must have really been off the rails I

mean, completely out of control. Truly

mean completely out of control Truly

psychotic. Let's Let's see what he said.

psychotic Let's Let's see what he said

We hit some new lows over the weekend

with the MAGA gang desperately trying to

characterize this kid who murdered

Charlie Kirk as anything other than one

of them and doing everything they can to

score political points from it. In

score political points from it In

between the fingerpointing, there was uh

between the fingerpointing there was uh

grieving.

grieving

>> Is that the clip?

>> Is that the clip

really cuz that's just Jimmy Kimmel.

really cuz that's just Jimmy Kimmel

I mean, given the FCC's response, I was

I mean given the FCC's response I was

expecting something more, you know,

expecting something more you know

provocative. That's like hearing that

provocative That's like hearing that

Playboy has a racy new centerfold and

finding out it's just Jimmy Kimmel.

finding out it's just Jimmy Kimmel

But Brendan Carr, he went even further,

But Brendan Carr he went even further

sending a clear signal to broadcasters

what their next move should be and

throwing in a little implied threat. I

throwing in a little implied threat I

think that it's it's it's really sort of

past time that a lot of these licensed

broadcasters themselves push back on

Comcast and Disney and say, "Listen, we

Comcast and Disney and say Listen we

are going to preempt. We are not going

are going to preempt We are not going

to run Kimmel anymore until you

straighten this out." I mean, look, we

straighten this out I mean look we

can do this the easy way or the hard

way.

way

>> Classic good guy talk. Joanne, would you

>> Classic good guy talk Joanne would you

make me the happiest man in the world?

make me the happiest man in the world

Look, we can do this the easy way or the

Look we can do this the easy way or the

hard way. Okay. the uh chairman of the

hard way Okay the uh chairman of the

Federal Communications Commission, who

Federal Communications Commission who

has the power over ABC's broadcast

licenses, sounds like he's telling them

licenses sounds like he's telling them

to punish Kimmel or else. It feels to me

to punish Kimmel or else It feels to me

like shutting down this type of speech

would represent a serious threat to our

freedoms. And you know who else thinks

freedoms And you know who else thinks

that? Brendan Carr in 2020 when he

that Brendan Carr in 2020 when he

tweeted, "From internet memes to late

tweeted From internet memes to late

night comedians, political satire helps

night comedians political satire helps

hold those in power accountable.

hold those in power accountable

Shutting down this type of political

speech, especially at the urging of

speech especially at the urging of

those targeted or threatened by its

message, would represent a serious

message would represent a serious

threat to our freedoms. Oh man, do not

threat to our freedoms Oh man do not

tell Brendan Carr that Brendan Carr said

that or he's going to get Brendan Carr

to cancel Brendan Carr.

to cancel Brendan Carr

>> Danger. You can't you can't

>> Danger You can't you can't

Brendan Carr's comments, they see they

Brendan Carr's comments they see they

really sure seem like marching orders.

really sure seem like marching orders

And right after that podcast, there was

And right after that podcast there was

an immediate reaction from NextStar,

an immediate reaction from NextStar

which is a local affiliate media group

that owns 32 ABC stations and not, as I

that owns 32 ABC stations and not as I

thought, how really drunk guys pronounce

thought how really drunk guys pronounce

NASCAR.

NASCAR

Next said it strongly objected to recent

comments made by Mr. Kimmel and would

comments made by Mr Kimmel and would

preempt the series for the immediate

future. Coincidentally, NextStar has a

future Coincidentally NextStar has a

major merger coming up before the Trump

administration.

administration

So, a company apparently capitulating to

So a company apparently capitulating to

the whims of the president in order to

ensure their merger goes through. Has

ensure their merger goes through Has

that ever happened before?

that ever happened before

And

what's that? What? I can't what?

what's that What I can't what

Oh, I'm being told not to answer that

Oh I'm being told not to answer that

question.

question

Uh, further coincidentally, Carr has

Uh further coincidentally Carr has

even more leverage over the network

because Disney, which owns ABC, also

because Disney which owns ABC also

needs the Trump administration's green

light for ESPN's deal to buy the NFL

network. Yes, everything is about

network Yes everything is about

corporate relationships. It's it's hard

corporate relationships It's it's hard

to keep track, but remember ABC is owned

to keep track but remember ABC is owned

by Disney, which also owns Pixar, which

by Disney which also owns Pixar which

is trying to merge with Twizzlers Pull

and Peel, who make the material that

and Peel who make the material that

Loheed Martin uses for the O-rings for

their Triton 2 missiles that the Defense

Department commissions with the cash it

got from its leverage buyout of

Claire's.

Claire's

Okay, it's

Okay it's

Anyway, shortly after Carr makes his

Anyway shortly after Carr makes his

statements about ABC, Kimmel gets yanked

statements about ABC Kimmel gets yanked

off the air. This decision came after

off the air This decision came after

senior executives at ABC, Disney, and

senior executives at ABC Disney and

affiliates convened emergency meetings

during which multiple execs felt that

Kimmel had not actually said anything

over the line. But the threat of Trump

over the line But the threat of Trump

administration retaliation loomed. As

administration retaliation loomed As

one source at ABC put it, they were

one source at ABC put it they were

pissing themselves all day.

pissing themselves all day

On the bright side, that proves Disney

On the bright side that proves Disney

is number one in streaming.

is number one in streaming

Thank you.

Thank you

Now, this this all this may seem bad,

Now this this all this may seem bad

but Carr was quick to reassure everyone,

but Carr was quick to reassure everyone

posting, "While this may be an

posting While this may be an

unprecedented decision, it is important

unprecedented decision it is important

for broadcasters to push back on Disney

programming that they determine falls

short of community values." Well, you

short of community values Well you

know what my community values are,

know what my community values are

Buster? Freedom of speech or

Buster Freedom of speech or

or as Alexander Hamilton called it,

or as Alexander Hamilton called it

Hakuna Matata.

Hakuna Matata

People across the country are shocked by

this blatant assault on the freedom of

speech. Connecticut Senator Chris Murphy

speech Connecticut Senator Chris Murphy

posted this video of himself. Steven

posted this video of himself Steven

Cobear is gone. Jimmy Kimmel is gone.

Cobear is gone Jimmy Kimmel is gone

He told me I was gone. I thought I could

He told me I was gone I thought I could

go.

Now, don't go far with this. Now,

Now don't go far with this Now

the administration claims this was not

their decision and it's not about Donald

Trump. You know who doesn't believe

Trump You know who doesn't believe

that? Donald Trump. Listen to the

that Donald Trump Listen to the

president justifying threatening

broadcast licenses of people who don't

like him.

like him

>> When you have a network and you have

evening shows and all they do is hit

Trump, that's all they do. If you go

Trump that's all they do If you go

back, I guess they haven't had a

back I guess they haven't had a

conservative on in years or something,

conservative on in years or something

somebody said. But when you go back and

somebody said But when you go back and

take a look, all they do is in trouble.

take a look all they do is in trouble

They're licensed. They're not allowed to

They're licensed They're not allowed to

do that.

do that

>> Yes, they are.

>> Yes they are

>> Since since since the beginning, since

>> Since since since the beginning since

Steve Allen, these shows have always

Steve Allen these shows have always

talked about the current president, and

talked about the current president and

that happens to be you. That's why you

that happens to be you That's why you

haven't heard me do too many Chester A.

haven't heard me do too many Chester A

Arthur jokes.

Arthur jokes

and and I got a lot. The A stands for a

and and I got a lot The A stands for a

whole lot of pubes on your face.

whole lot of pubes on your face

So no matter what they claim, this is

So no matter what they claim this is

not entirely about what Jimmy said on

Monday, this was part of a plan. How do

Monday this was part of a plan How do

I know that? Two months ago, when the

I know that Two months ago when the

president was tastefully celebrating my

cancellation, he posted Jimmy Kimmel is

cancellation he posted Jimmy Kimmel is

next to go. How would he have known?

next to go How would he have known

Either either Jimmy getting thrown off

the air was his plan all along or he was

the one who stole that almanac from Doc

Brown's Delorean.

Brown's Delorean

God, it is so bizarre. It is so bizarre

God it is so bizarre It is so bizarre

to see an American president weighing in

so veheently on TV shows. It reminds me

so veheently on TV shows It reminds me

when Reagan said this,

when Reagan said this

>> "Mr. Gorbachov,

>> Mr Gorbachov

cancel the Golden Girls."

cancel the Golden Girls

>> This whole thing This whole thing is is

the the latest and boldest action in a

long campaign against media critics.

long campaign against media critics

Trump has personally sued ABC, CBS, the

Trump has personally sued ABC CBS the

New York Times, the Wall Street Journal,

New York Times the Wall Street Journal

the De Mo Register, and his bathroom

the De Mo Register and his bathroom

scale. Plus,

scale Plus

he defunded PBS and NPR and has already

found his next target. Last night, he

found his next target Last night he

posted, "Jimmy Kimmel show is

posted Jimmy Kimmel show is

cancelled." That leaves Jimmy and Seth

cancelled That leaves Jimmy and Seth

to total losers on Fake News NBC. Their

to total losers on Fake News NBC Their

ratings are also horrible. Do it. NBC

ratings are also horrible Do it NBC

president DJT. Good lord.

president DJT Good lord

Well, you you heard the man. I guess

Well you you heard the man I guess

we're all going to end up working out

our new podcast, Fired Force 5. We got a

our new podcast Fired Force 5 We got a

great show for you tonight. My guests

great show for you tonight My guests

are Jake Tapper and David. When we come

are Jake Tapper and David When we come

back, we'll hear an opposing view from

back we'll hear an opposing view from

an old friend. Stick around. Heat.

an old friend Stick around Heat

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Heat.

Heat

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