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[Music]

Music

It's been a tough week for America. No

It's been a tough week for America No

matter what side of the aisle you've

been on, we have all been processing

been on we have all been processing

what happened to Charlie Kirk and what's

happened since. Honestly, I don't even

happened since Honestly I don't even

know if I have the right words for this.

know if I have the right words for this

But I do take comfort in knowing that

I'm not the only one who can't seem to

find the right words.

find the right words

>> Coach, how are you holding up over the

>> Coach how are you holding up over the

last three and a half years? I think

last three and a half years I think

very good. And by the way, right there

very good And by the way right there

you see all the trucks. They've just

you see all the trucks They've just

started construction of the new ball for

the White House, which is something

the White House which is something

they've been trying to get, as you know,

they've been trying to get as you know

for about 150 years. And it's going to

for about 150 years And it's going to

be a beauty. It'll be a absolutely

be a beauty It'll be a absolutely

magnificent structure.

magnificent structure

>> Well, we all grieve in our own way.

>> Well we all grieve in our own way

To be fair to Trump, he is an old man.

To be fair to Trump he is an old man

And when an old man wants to tell a

story, it doesn't matter what you asked

story it doesn't matter what you asked

him about.

him about

Uncle Marty, you want some coffee? You

Uncle Marty you want some coffee You

know my dentist is an Asian lady.

know my dentist is an Asian lady

She dyed her hair pink. I told her, "You

She dyed her hair pink I told her You

look disgusting."

look disgusting

But while the president is retreating

into home renovations, the internet has

into home renovations the internet has

been processing Kirk's death in a

different way. If you've been on social

different way If you've been on social

media over the past week, you've

media over the past week you've

probably seen some pretty shocking

reactions to a public figure getting

assassinated. There was celebration.

assassinated There was celebration

There was mockery. Honestly, I found a

There was mockery Honestly I found a

lot of it so disturbing I almost went

back to threads.

back to threads

I mean, I didn't. Nothing could make me

I mean I didn't Nothing could make me

go back to threads, but I did think

go back to threads but I did think

about it. And as expected, when people

about it And as expected when people

are being this shitty on the internet,

are being this shitty on the internet

there's going to be backlash

>> on social media. People who've

>> on social media People who've

criticized Kirk are being called out,

criticized Kirk are being called out

their names and photos widely

circulated.

circulated

>> Some people who celebrated his death are

now under scrutiny from conservative

activists. Those activists have created

activists Those activists have created

online websites to hold accountable

those behind the messages. The website

those behind the messages The website

claims it's received more than 63,000

claims it's received more than 63000

submissions so far.

submissions so far

>> Some employers already firing or

suspending people for their posts about

Kirk, impacting teachers, commercial

Kirk impacting teachers commercial

pilots, doctors, and even NFL staff.

pilots doctors and even NFL staff

Even the NFL staff are getting fired.

Even the NFL staff are getting fired

Oh, that's why the Giants suck.

Oh that's why the Giants suck

Okay. Okay. Unfortunately, this is a

Okay Okay Unfortunately this is a

pattern we've gotten used to because we

live in an internet landscape that is so

toxic even RFK wouldn't swim in it. So,

toxic even RFK wouldn't swim in it So

every horrible event tends to have the

same cycle. One side starts posting

same cycle One side starts posting

their hot takes for clicks and the other

side tries to cancel them for it. But

side tries to cancel them for it But

one thing is different this time. This

one thing is different this time This

time the government's getting involved.

time the government's getting involved

>> Employers, you have an obligation to get

>> Employers you have an obligation to get

rid of people. People say, "Oh, people

rid of people People say Oh people

have a right to say things." Well,

have a right to say things Well

actually, they don't necessarily have a

actually they don't necessarily have a

right to say things. I think it is time

right to say things I think it is time

for this to be uh to be a crackdown on

people.

people

>> So, when you see someone celebrating

>> So when you see someone celebrating

Charlie's murder, call them out in hell.

Charlie's murder call them out in hell

Call their employer.

Call their employer

>> Hold on. The vice president wants me to

>> Hold on The vice president wants me to

try to get people fired from their jobs.

try to get people fired from their jobs

First off, as a white woman, we've been

First off as a white woman we've been

doing that for years. Okay, stop

doing that for years Okay stop

appropriating our culture.

appropriating our culture

But secondly, is this what we want? The

But secondly is this what we want The

vice president's job isn't to lead an

online mob. The vice president's job is

online mob The vice president's job is

to Okay, he doesn't really have a job,

to Okay he doesn't really have a job

but you get my point.

but you get my point

You get it?

You get it

And look, a lot of people are saying

And look a lot of people are saying

that this is a left versus right thing.

that this is a left versus right thing

But truly, I think this problem goes so

But truly I think this problem goes so

much deeper. Our discourse has been so

much deeper Our discourse has been so

poisoned by the internet that our

elected officials are now using the

power and resources of the federal

government to carry out social media

style justice. Secretary Pete Hegth has

style justice Secretary Pete Hegth has

directed his staff to look for posts

from service members. Secretary of State

from service members Secretary of State

Marco Rubio floated revoking critics

visas. The power of law enforcement

visas The power of law enforcement

under President Trump's leadership will

be used to find you, will use to take

be used to find you will use to take

away your money, take away your power.

away your money take away your power

>> Republican Congressman Klay Higgins of

Louisiana posted he will use his

congressional authority to get people

banned for life from social media

platforms, blacklist their businesses,

platforms blacklist their businesses

and they should be kicked out of school

and have their driver's licenses

revoked.

revoked

>> All right. First of all, revoking

>> All right First of all revoking

someone's driver's license is not a

punishment for them. It's a punishment

punishment for them It's a punishment

for their friends. Okay? I'm not driving

for their friends Okay I'm not driving

Amy to the airport because you got mad

at her tweets. Clay Higgins, you drive

at her tweets Clay Higgins you drive

Amy to the airport.

Amy to the airport

But do you see how far this has gotten

out of control? We're going to revoke a

out of control We're going to revoke a

person's driver's license just for

having shitty tweets. And our attorney

having shitty tweets And our attorney

general is in so deep that she doesn't

think it's going far enough.

think it's going far enough

>> There's free speech and then there's

hate speech. And there is no place,

hate speech And there is no place

especially now, especially after what

especially now especially after what

happened to Charlie in our society. We

happened to Charlie in our society We

will absolutely target you, go after

will absolutely target you go after

you. If you are targeting anyone with

you If you are targeting anyone with

hate speech, anything. And that's across

hate speech anything And that's across

the aisle.

the aisle

[Laughter]

Laughter

First of all, you would think that the

First of all you would think that the

attorney general would know that hate

speech is protected by the First

Amendment.

Amendment

Even if you're not a big reader, it is

Even if you're not a big reader it is

the first one. Okay? You have to read it

the first one Okay You have to read it

to get to the one you like. Now,

to get to the one you like Now

honestly, if I went back in time and

honestly if I went back in time and

told the founding fathers that this is

what would become of the First

Amendment, they would say, "That's

Amendment they would say That's

insane. And why are you wearing pants,

insane And why are you wearing pants

woman?

woman

to which I would say, why are you

to which I would say why are you

wearing a wig?

wearing a wig

Anyway,

Anyway

I'm getting off track. I'm getting off

I'm getting off track I'm getting off

track. The point is, we need to

track The point is we need to

understand that no matter how mad

someone makes you online, that's not

someone makes you online that's not

enough to make it illegal. That said, if

enough to make it illegal That said if

you are going to crack down on hate

speech, can I request that we start with

speech can I request that we start with

the YouTube comments under my lasagna

recipe?

recipe

My mozzarella portions are not gay. Very

My mozzarella portions are not gay Very

good.

good

Now, I was heartened to see a lot of

Now I was heartened to see a lot of

conservatives criticize Pam Bondi for

what she said about prosecuting hate

speech. Unfortunately, one guy thinks

speech Unfortunately one guy thinks

she didn't go far enough.

she didn't go far enough

>> And what do you think Pam Bondi is

saying? She's going to go after hate

saying She's going to go after hate

speech. Uh, is that I mean, a lot of

speech Uh is that I mean a lot of

people, a lot of your allies say hate

people a lot of your allies say hate

speech is free speech.

speech is free speech

>> You should probably go after people like

you because you treat me so unfairly.

you because you treat me so unfairly

It's hate. You have a lot of hate in

It's hate You have a lot of hate in

your heart.

your heart

>> Yikes. Someone's ballroom construction

>> Yikes Someone's ballroom construction

is not going well. President Trump still

is not going well President Trump still

can't shake the Jeffrey Epstein scandal.

can't shake the Jeffrey Epstein scandal

So this week, Congress heard testimony

So this week Congress heard testimony

from Cash Patel, FBI director and man

from Cash Patel FBI director and man

who looks like he just walked in on his

parents having sex with a [ __ ]

parents having sex with a __

And if I know anything about Cash Patel,

And if I know anything about Cash Patel

I know he can smooth everything over.

I know he can smooth everything over

weaponization of intelligence by the

likes of you and we have

>> Why don't you just release the entire

file as you promised to do?

file as you promised to do

>> We are releasing as much as legally

allowed. That's why we went back.

allowed That's why we went back

>> How is that how is that not legally

allowed?

allowed

>> Sir, do you know how court orders work?

>> Sir do you know how court orders work

Do you know how protective orders work?

Do you know how protective orders work

>> Actually, Mr. Patel, I was a prosecutor

>> Actually Mr Patel I was a prosecutor

for 10 years. I know exactly how.

for 10 years I know exactly how

>> So, I was a

>> So I was a

recognize gentleman from his men. Why

recognize gentleman from his men Why

are you protecting pedophiles?

are you protecting pedophiles

>> That is maybe the most offensive thing

you could say to me.

you could say to me

That's maybe the most offensive thing

you could say to me. Patel's like,

you could say to me Patel's like

"Listen, there's a lot you could say

Listen there's a lot you could say

about me. Like, I'm the only person who

about me Like I'm the only person who

looks dumber wearing glasses or how I

only got this job because Trump thought

I was Desh D Suza."

I was Desh D Suza

But I almost felt bad for Patel. He had

But I almost felt bad for Patel He had

to convincingly pretend that his boss

had nothing to do with Jeffrey Epstein

and he was not up for the task.

and he was not up for the task

>> How many times did President Trump's

name appear in the Epstein files? Was it

name appear in the Epstein files Was it

more than a 100? More than a thousand?

more than a 100 More than a thousand

>> It sounds like if you don't know the

number, it could at least be a thousand

number it could at least be a thousand

times.

times

>> It's not.

>> It's not

>> Is it at least 500 times?

>> Is it at least 500 times

>> No.

>> No

>> Is it at least 100 times?

>> Is it at least 100 times

>> No.

>> No

>> Then what's the number?

>> Then what's the number

>> I don't know the number, but it's not

>> I don't know the number but it's not

that.

that

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. It's not that.

Yeah Yeah Okay It's not that

Everyone just needs to calm down. Okay.

Everyone just needs to calm down Okay

The president's name appears in the

pedophile sex crime report a normal

number of times. Okay. Somewhere between

number of times Okay Somewhere between

one and Hey, look over there.

one and Hey look over there

Listen, it does not look like Cash Patel

Listen it does not look like Cash Patel

can do this on his own. Mr. President,

can do this on his own Mr President

get down to Capitol Hill and show Patel

you got his back.

you got his back

>> The president left the White House today

heading to London for a state visit.

heading to London for a state visit

>> Wow. Cash did not see that coming

>> Wow Cash did not see that coming

somehow.

somehow

But yes, Trump left his troubles behind

But yes Trump left his troubles behind

yesterday as he embarked on a three-day

state visit to the UK, his happy place,

state visit to the UK his happy place

where the king is in charge and

vegetables are illegal.

vegetables are illegal

Of course, our relationship with Britain

Of course our relationship with Britain

is not great right now. We're fighting

is not great right now We're fighting

over tariffs in Gaza and Ukraine. So,

over tariffs in Gaza and Ukraine So

there were a lot of issues to discuss on

this visit. Although Trump was more

this visit Although Trump was more

excited about another aspect of the

trip.

trip

>> Well, my relationship is very good with

>> Well my relationship is very good with

the UK and Charles, as you know, who's

the UK and Charles as you know who's

now king, is my friend.

now king is my friend

>> Yes, Trump is like a brother to King

>> Yes Trump is like a brother to King

Charles in that his actual brother is

also in the Epstein files.

also in the Epstein files

And because Trump is so tight with the

king, he made sure to let us know that

king he made sure to let us know that

he's getting the VIP treatment.

he's getting the VIP treatment

>> And it's the first time this has ever

happened where somebody was honored

twice. So, it's a great honor. And this

twice So it's a great honor And this

one's at Windsor. They've never used

one's at Windsor They've never used

Windsor Castle for this before. They

Windsor Castle for this before They

Buckingham Palace. And I don't want to

Buckingham Palace And I don't want to

say one's better than the other, but

say one's better than the other but

they say Windsor Castle is the ultimate,

they say Windsor Castle is the ultimate

right?

right

They sure do, Mr. President. The

They sure do Mr President The

ultimate castle for the prettiest

princess.

princess

>> Leave it to Trump to pit castles against

each other. I don't want to make it a

each other I don't want to make it a

competition, but if it is, I win.

competition but if it is I win

He was so excited for this trip, but the

He was so excited for this trip but the

ride there got a little bumpy.

ride there got a little bumpy

>> But before the president even arrived in

the UK, a rare encounter in the skies. A

the UK a rare encounter in the skies A

Spirit Airlines jet coming too close to

comfort to Air Force One. Rebuked by air

comfort to Air Force One Rebuked by air

traffic control.

traffic control

>> Pay attention. SP 1300, turn 20° right.

>> Pay attention SP 1300 turn 20° right

I'll keep an eye out for him. He's white

I'll keep an eye out for him He's white

and blue. Pay attention. Get off the

and blue Pay attention Get off the

iPad.

iPad

>> Get off the iPad. It's Spirit Airlines.

>> Get off the iPad It's Spirit Airlines

How's the pilot going to Google how to

fly a plane?

fly a plane

So, the flight over wasn't great, but

So the flight over wasn't great but

once Air Force One landed, the UK rolled

once Air Force One landed the UK rolled

out the red carpet. The president, the

out the red carpet The president the

first lady made a stunning entrance with

Melania hiding her head under a UFO.

Melania hiding her head under a UFO

And from there, it was on to Windsor

And from there it was on to Windsor

Castle to tell the beef eaters that he's

also on an all beef diet.

also on an all beef diet

And that that was followed by a parade

in which one horse gave Trump a special

salute of his own.

salute of his own

You know, RFK Jr. texted him after like,

You know RFK Jr texted him after like

"Bring me some leftovers."

Bring me some leftovers

But then, of course, Trump took part in

But then of course Trump took part in

the timehonored tradition of pretending

he cares about history.

he cares about history

Sorry, what

Sorry what

what the hell is going on with Melania

right here?

right here

Is she even in there or did she just did

she just put her clothes on a coat rack

and sneak out?

and sneak out

Now, tomorrow Trump will be meeting with

Now tomorrow Trump will be meeting with

the prime minister to talk policy. But

the prime minister to talk policy But

he had such a wonderful time today with

all the pomp and circumstance. And it

all the pomp and circumstance And it

must have been so nice to spend some

time in such ultimate surroundings and

forget all about the drama and the

troubles back home. Protesters here

troubles back home Protesters here

overnight projecting a photo of

President Trump alongside convicted sex

offender Jeffrey Epstein on the walls of

Windsor.

Windsor

>> Oh man, not all over the good castle.

>> Oh man not all over the good castle

So Donald Trump went all the way to

England and still couldn't escape the

Epstein scandal that haunts him back

home. I mean, come on. At this point, I

home I mean come on At this point I

I almost feel bad. How many times does

I almost feel bad How many times does

Trump have to be reminded of this thing?

Trump have to be reminded of this thing

1,000 times,

1000 times

500 times,

500 times

100 times?

100 times

>> I don't know the number, but it's not

>> I don't know the number but it's not

that.

that

>> If you felt a little off these past

couple of days, it's probably because

couple of days it's probably because

our great father has not been home.

our great father has not been home

Your father has been gracing England

with his legendary

warmth and radiance,

warmth and radiance

gazed upon him with a gate even more

majestic than that of the royal horses

that pranced before him. He wowed the

that pranced before him He wowed the

English with charm, intelligence, and an

English with charm intelligence and an

undeniable sexual charisma

that filled their air like a pheromone

packed London fog.

packed London fog

And as part of this historic trip,

And as part of this historic trip

the perfectly tinted Trump

dazzled his hosts at dinner with a

demonstration of unmatched oratory

skill. A fifth of all of humanity

skill A fifth of all of humanity

speaks, writes, thinks, and prays in the

speaks writes thinks and prays in the

language born on these aisles and

perfected in the pages of Shakespeare

and Dickens and Tolen, Lewis, Orwell and

and Dickens and Tolen Lewis Orwell and

Kipling.

Kipling

Incredible people.

Incredible people

[Applause]

Applause

He didn't have to look down once,

He didn't have to look down once

completely off book as he namech checked

his favorite authors

from the top of his head.

from the top of his head

Trump employing restraint not to quote

verbatim these great authors.

verbatim these great authors

Our president has devoured voraciously.

Our president has devoured voraciously

Incredible people indeed.

Incredible people indeed

[Applause]

Applause

I'll tell you whose client list Trump's

name is on Dewey Decimals.

name is on Dewey Decimals

[Applause]

Applause

But of course, as great as those authors

But of course as great as those authors

are, there can only be one most

are there can only be one most

tremendous author in the English

language. And I think we know that that

language And I think we know that that

author begins with the T

and ends

in key.

in key

Oh, how fortune has smiled upon us. For

Oh how fortune has smiled upon us For

that very scribe is also our dear

leader. We joined by history and fate

leader We joined by history and fate

and by love and language. We're like two

and by love and language We're like two

notes in one chord or two verses of the

same poem. Each beautiful on its own,

same poem Each beautiful on its own

but really meant to be played together.

but really meant to be played together

>> The whole room is enthralled.

>> The whole room is enthralled

That's resting interest face.

That's resting interest face

[Applause]

Applause

It was a most beautiful recitation, Mr.

It was a most beautiful recitation Mr

President. It brings me to tears almost

President It brings me to tears almost

as much as your favorite poem about that

man from Nantucket

and the variety of things that man can

do that rhyme

with Tucket.

with Tucket

Although, Mr. President, if I may

Although Mr President if I may

humbly, I beg of you to take a small

humbly I beg of you to take a small

detour off this highway of adoration you

have so richly earned for a bit of a

comic repasted. Um, what the is on this

comic repasted Um what the is on this

guy's head?

guy's head

Hang on the mistletoe you want, Earl of

Hang on the mistletoe you want Earl of

Higgin Hoffen Ballum.

Higgin Hoffen Ballum

Our president's luscious lips shall

never grace your forehead.

never grace your forehead

Or is that [ __ ] is that some sort of

Or is that __ is that some sort of

second rate Harry Potter scar [ __ ]

second rate Harry Potter scar __

What's on his head?

What's on his head

He's scarred with the mark of the phone.

He's scarred with the mark of the phone

Nvia growtosis.

Nvia growtosis

But the president, almost despicably

But the president almost despicably

humble,

humble

gave the royals a rare glimpse at his

soft-spoken yet prideful side.

soft-spoken yet prideful side

>> We had a very

sick country one year ago, and today I

sick country one year ago and today I

believe we're the hottest country

anywhere in the world. In fact, nobody's

anywhere in the world In fact nobody's

even questioning it.

even questioning it

[Applause]

Applause

Nobody.

Nobody

Certainly not thising guy. Am I right?

Certainly not thising guy Am I right

[Applause]

Applause

You got something to say to me, King

You got something to say to me King

Chuck? Don't make eye contact, [ __ ]

Chuck Don't make eye contact __

I'm the alpha dog.

I'm the alpha dog

Trump knows USA is the hottest we've

ever been. And not just because of

ever been And not just because of

climate change.

climate change

Which is a good thing. It's actually

Which is a good thing It's actually

climate change is it's a good thing.

climate change is it's a good thing

[Applause]

Applause

Cities

should be part of the ocean

if you think about it. Because obviously

if you think about it Because obviously

what's more important than staying

hydrated?

hydrated

Four cities.

Four cities

Of course, this visit wasn't just an

Of course this visit wasn't just an

opportunity for President Trump to rub

shoulders with lesser royals. He also

shoulders with lesser royals He also

met with political lessers like the

British prime minister who had to be

reminded that Trump has ended all the

wars in the world,

wars in the world

especially the one between Azeraijan

and Armenia. to think that we settled uh

and Armenia to think that we settled uh

Abberaijan

and Albania as an example.

and Albania as an example

[Applause]

Applause

[Applause]

Applause

I would like to apologize very quickly.

I would like to apologize very quickly

Uh I stand corrected.

Uh I stand corrected

Azerbaijan

is actually pronounced Aberian

[Applause]

Applause

and

Armenia

is pronounced

Albania.

Albania

I regret the error. Trump ended the war

I regret the error Trump ended the war

between Aberian

and Albania. Do better. Do better. Do

and Albania Do better Do better Do

better.

better

Dumb [ __ ] B.

Dumb __ B

[Applause]

Applause

That wasn't smart either.

That wasn't smart either

Now, the visit to England couldn't have

Now the visit to England couldn't have

gone better for our president. Finally,

gone better for our president Finally

a country affording our great leader the

respect and deference that any son god

would command. We saw the dismissal of a

would command We saw the dismissal of a

very well-known chat show host in

America last night, Mr. Kimmel. Is free

America last night Mr Kimmel Is free

speech more under attack in Britain or

America?

America

>> How dare you, sir?

>> How dare you sir

>> How dare you, sir?

>> How dare you sir

What What outfit are you with, sir? The

What What outfit are you with sir The

Antifa Herald Tribune.

Antifa Herald Tribune

Why? I wouldn't even line my parents'

Why I wouldn't even line my parents'

cage with your rag.

cage with your rag

There's a very reasonable explanation

for what befell this scallywag

Kimble.

Kimble

>> Well, Jimmy Kimmel was fired because he

>> Well Jimmy Kimmel was fired because he

had bad ratings more than anything else.

had bad ratings more than anything else

And he said a horrible thing about a

great gentleman known as Charlie Kirk.

great gentleman known as Charlie Kirk

And Jimmy Kimmel is not a talented

person. He had very bad ratings. And

person He had very bad ratings And

they should have fired him a long time

ago. So, you know, you can call that

ago So you know you can call that

free speech or not.

free speech or not

Shut the [ __ ] up.

Shut the __ up

Yay.

Yay

You may call it free speech in jolly old

England, but in America, we have a

England but in America we have a

little something called the First

Amendment. And let me tell you how it

Amendment And let me tell you how it

works. There's something called a talent

works There's something called a talent

ometer.

ometer

It's a completely scientific instrument

that is kept on the president's desk and

it tells the president when a

performer's TQ talent quotient

measured mostly by niceness to the

president goes below a certain level at

which point the FCC must be notified to

threaten the acquisition prospects for

billion-dollar mergers of network

affiliates. These affiliates are then

affiliates These affiliates are then

asked to give ultimatives to the even

larger mega corporation that controls

the flow of state approved content. Or

the flow of state approved content Or

the FCC can just choose to threaten

those licenses directly. It's basic

those licenses directly It's basic

science.

science

Read your constitution.

Read your constitution

Read it.

Read it

Look, there are certain rules of free

Look there are certain rules of free

speech that we must all abide by. But in

speech that we must all abide by But in

case anyone needs a refresher, we're

case anyone needs a refresher we're

going to go over the rules again. He

going to go over the rules again He

does not have a right to have a

television show where he lies his ass

off to the American people.

off to the American people

>> There are repercussions to spreading

lies.

lies

>> Exactly.

>> Exactly

And even though two months ago our

president because of his grand ability

to see the future, it's a curse.

to see the future it's a curse

Somehow knew that Kimell would be next

as he explicitly said.

as he explicitly said

You can't just make things up on

television. People cannot just go on

television People cannot just go on

television and mislead viewers with

madeup crap.

madeup crap

>> Millions of illegal aliens that Borazar

Harris brought into the country will be

voting. The bottom line is this. There

voting The bottom line is this There

is massive voter fraud. Global warming

is massive voter fraud Global warming

is a hoax.

is a hoax

>> Crime. Crime is at an all-time high

>> Crime Crime is at an all-time high

right now. 50 million on condoms in

right now 50 million on condoms in

Gaza.

Gaza

>> They're taking people's pets and killing

them and eating them. On January 6, two

them and eating them On January 6 two

years ago, the overwhelming majority

years ago the overwhelming majority

were peaceful. They were orderly and

were peaceful They were orderly and

meek. These were not insurrectionists.

meek These were not insurrectionists

They were sightseers.

They were sightseers

All true.

All true

[Applause]

Applause

Oh, your lordship.

Oh your lordship

[Applause]

Applause

I do not know whence these peasants

come.

come

That last roll of clips. All true.

That last roll of clips All true

Especially that last one about

sightseers because technically anything

you see

is a sight.

is a sight

Even even if even if that is

even if that is you punching a cop.

even if that is you punching a cop

I see.

I see

Therefore I am sightseeing.

Therefore I am sightseeing

But of course, even before this Jason

But of course even before this Jason

Kringle situation at ABC,

Kringle situation at ABC

there were plenty of other people in

America exercising their free speech

incorrectly. So, here are some examples

incorrectly So here are some examples

of things you cannot say about your

political opponents.

political opponents

>> You can't call someone who you disagree

with a fascist.

with a fascist

>> Leaders cannot call their political

oppon opponents Nazis and fascists and

enemies of the state. how horrible and

enemies of the state how horrible and

dangerous it is to view people with whom

we disagree as somehow being less than

human.

human

>> Thank you. You can't say fascist. You

>> Thank you You can't say fascist You

can't say enemy of the state. You can't

can't say enemy of the state You can't

say less than human. These are simple

say less than human These are simple

rules that any responsible member of a

society can easily follow. The

society can easily follow The

Democrats, they're fascists. Joe Biden,

Democrats they're fascists Joe Biden

he's an enemy of the state. It's a very

he's an enemy of the state It's a very

demonic party. Nancy Pelosi said,

demonic party Nancy Pelosi said

"Please don't call them animals. They're

Please don't call them animals They're

human beings." I said, "No, they're

human beings I said No they're

animals." Of course, I think she's an

animals Of course I think she's an

animal, too. You want to know the truth?

animal too You want to know the truth

>> Technically correct.

>> Technically correct

She's not a mineral.

She's not a mineral

[Music]

Music

[Applause]

Applause

Anyway, he he said that a long time ago

Anyway he he said that a long time ago

back when I was doing a semester abroad

in Abu Hyen.

in Abu Hyen

You know what? It's not really about the

You know what It's not really about the

specific words. It It's about having a

specific words It It's about having a

basic sense of humanity.

basic sense of humanity

>> People on the left are much likelier to

defend and celebrate political violence.

defend and celebrate political violence

This is not a both sides problem. The

This is not a both sides problem The

First Amendment though does not protect

entertainers

who say crass or thoughtless things as

Jimmy Kimmel did.

Jimmy Kimmel did

Thank you. Thank both of you.

Thank you Thank both of you

Or I think we only have to be nice to

one of you.

one of you

You know it is true. I I do point taken.

You know it is true I I do point taken

Only a bad person would celebrate

violence or make crass jokes about it.

violence or make crass jokes about it

>> Nancy Pelosi, well, she's got protection

>> Nancy Pelosi well she's got protection

when she's in DC. Apparently, her house

when she's in DC Apparently her house

doesn't have a lot of protection.

doesn't have a lot of protection

>> Donald Trump Jr. shared an image of a

>> Donald Trump Jr shared an image of a

hammer in a pair of underwear. That had

hammer in a pair of underwear That had

the caption, "Got my Paul Pelosi

the caption Got my Paul Pelosi

Halloween costume ready."

Halloween costume ready

>> Well, maybe Paul Pelosi needs the the

>> Well maybe Paul Pelosi needs the the

hammer instead of the metal.

hammer instead of the metal

>> Well,

>> Well

it's metal. All right, Rachel.

it's metal All right Rachel

[Laughter]

Laughter

No, no, no. Stop. And by the way, they

No no no Stop And by the way they

were there were consequences. This

were there were consequences This

gentleman had to leave television.

gentleman had to leave television

I I'm not sure where he went, but I'm

I I'm not sure where he went but I'm

sure it's not some prestigious

consequential position he's not remotely

qualified for. Who is it?

qualified for Who is it

These two, these two,

These two these two

these two could learn a lesson from our

dear president who

like Santa

knows that we are all God's children and

would never That is what Santa is,

would never That is what Santa is

right? God's chas.

right God's chas

I'm not so up on the lore.

I'm not so up on the lore

I know he's good,

I know he's good

but the president knows we're all God's

children. And the president would never

children And the president would never

make light of a politically motivated

attack.

attack

>> Will stand up to crazy Nancy Pelosi who

ruined San Francisco.

ruined San Francisco

[Applause]

Applause

How's her husband doing, by the way?

How's her husband doing by the way

Anybody know?

Anybody know

>> You see, that's how it's done. You stop

>> You see that's how it's done You stop

in the middle of a speech to inquire

about the condition of an 82year-old man

who was attacked with a hammer in his

own home. He has a fractured skull, Mr.

own home He has a fractured skull Mr

President, but thank you for asking.

President but thank you for asking

Your kindness is only outshined by your

manliness.

manliness

So, I don't know who this uh I don't

So I don't know who this uh I don't

know who this this

Johnny Drimmel live ABC character is,

Johnny Drimmel live ABC character is

but the point is our great

administration has laid out very clear

rules on free speech.

rules on free speech

Now, some naysayers may argue that this

Now some naysayers may argue that this

administration's speech concerns are

merely a cynical ploy, a thin gr of a

merely a cynical ploy a thin gr of a

ruse, a smokeokc screen to obscure an

ruse a smokeokc screen to obscure an

unprecedented consolidation of power and

unitary intimidation, principleless and

unitary intimidation principleless and

coldly antithetical to any experiment in

a constitutional republic governance.

a constitutional republic governance

Some people would say that.

Some people would say that

Not me, though. I think it's great. Ah,

Not me though I think it's great Ah

[Music]

Music

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